12 May 2014

Exam season is upon us friends and that means a lot of stuff is going to get done that will benefit every aspect of your life, barring your education. I'm not going to use the term 'procrastination' as it implies your activities of choice are less important than revision... Here is some inspiration to help you, like me, probably fail all of your exams!

  • Bake something. I like this one because it benefits people who aren't you as well. You'll probably gain a few pounds and maybe befriend some hungry people.
  • Make 'revision' playlists. 
  • Walk to the shop for 'revision' snacks.
  • Teach yourself about British politics. (if you're studying Politics then please skip this one)
  • Read a book. This is for people who feel guilty about not revising. 
  • Go to the gym. Who needs qualifications if you're toned?
  • Clear out all the shit from under your bed and the clothes you haven't worn since you were 7. 
  • Regarding the previous step, sell said shit on eBay and maybe make some money.
  • Go out and get drunk. 
  • Nap. You can't revise if you're feeling sleepy. 
  • Watch an entire series on Netflix.
  • Bathe! If you're clean it means your life is in order.
  • Exfoliate your butt. If you're smooth it also means your life is in order.
If you're still looking for a productive activity to fill the time tonight, before your exam tomorrow morning, you could probably rearrange your entire bedroom. The feng shui of your workspace obviously affects your study. 

Once you've done all of this, you're welcome to spend your days making flashcards and doing past papers - make sure you save them all for your re-sits next year. 


6 May 2014

There exists a part of life in which you are neither a child nor an adult and I am certainly currently experiencing said stage. There are certain characteristics, however, that can help you place yourself into one of these two incredibly vague categories. This is, in my opinion, a list of components that (if you find yourself agreeing to) can let you know if you're a ~grown up~ or not. 

  • Choosing to have a starter at a restaurant and turning down a pudding. (Eating savoury snacks instead of chocolate also applies here.)
  • Understanding the importance of eating vegetables and eating them willingly.
  • Enjoying the taste of coffee.
  • 'Bedtime' being no longer a word with negative connotations. 
  • Enjoying wine??????????
  • Feeling like you've 'wasted the day' if you wake up after 10.

However, after this age-based limbo comes the stage where you are 100% adult and there certainly is no turning back. Some might call it middle aged... This time in your life (and I base this on my own mother and her friends) includes behaviour such as the following:

  • Using slang words in texts and typing 'LOL' in capital letters.
  • Using the term 'slang words'.
  • Using Groupon on a daily basis.
  • Typing on your phone using the index finger on one hand.
  • Wearing 'reading glasses' on the end of your nose for watching TV. 
  • Playing Scrabble on your iPad with your sister who lives 10 minutes walk away. "Olivia, isn't technology wonderful?!"

This list could definitely go on for a long time but I fear I've already offended and do not wish to do so much further. Do the maths and work out if you're too far gone up the maturity scale.